Look to the right and see: there is none who takes notice of me; no refuge remains to me; no one cares for my soul.
Psalm 142:4 (ESV)
Lord Jesus, sometimes I so feel this way! As I wrestle through the challenges of just being, trying to live up to the calling You have placed on my life to love unconditionally, I can feel so battered by the storms, tossed by the waves, that my soul falls into a place of deep despair. Like the disciples, tossed by the winds and currents, fearing for their life, called to You asking don’t You care, I sometimes feel that way, left alone and abandoned, consigned to my my own devices to fend for myself. I often feel like a shadow drifting along, laid out flat on the surface of the world, open for all to just step on me.
Yet, I know that my feelings can deceive me. I know that I can be easily drawn into a world that denies faith and dashes to pieces hope. Therefore, today, like David, though my soul stands on the brink of distress, I choose to encourage myself (1 Samuel 30:6). I remind myself of what You have declared regarding me in Your Word, namely:
- You have purposed that I will not always have this feeling like everyone and everything is trodding on me (Deuteronomy 28:13)
- When it feels like I’m in over my head, You are there (Isaiah 43:2)
- You will give me the wisdom I need in the moment to deal with my circumstances (James 1:5)
- You will comfort me (2 Corinthians 1:3-4)
- You will give me rest when I’m tired and feel like giving up (Matthew 11:28)
So today, I trust You. I look to You to glorify Yourself not only in me but in my circumstances. I lay all of my cares and burdens at Your feet, for I know You care for me (1 Peter 5:7). Therefore, I shall look to You in all circumstances, knowing Whose I am and who I am in You! Amen.