But Mary treasured up all these things, pondering them in her heart.
Luke 2:19
Father, as I sit here in utter silence, the silence that it seems only Christmas brings, my soul is in awe even as I am sure Mary’s was. Having been told that she, a virgin, would conceive and bear a child begotten by the Holy Spirit – carrying this reality in her womb for nine months, with no one to share this truth with but her betrothed husband, a pregnancy that I am sure was no different than any other pregnancy endured by a woman save its miraculous conception – she is now looking down at that infant, helpless and vulnerable. I am convinced that though her heart was filled with the love that only a mother has for their newborn, she must have been overwhelmed at the same time with a sense of wonder. How could this totally dependent baby be the Savior of the world? Even as You continued to send reminders to her of this supernaturally, extraordinary, once-in-creation event with visits from complete strangers, still in the silent in-between moments the paradox of that reality, I’m sure, had to at times jar her reality. He Who was the King of kings and Lord of lords, Immanuel, required someone to feed Him and change His soiled clothes. He needed to be rocked to sleep, bathed, groomed, taught to walk, and even taught to speak. How could He, Who could not even control His own body at this point, be the One Who would save the world? How could this totally dependent one be the One we all depend on?
As I meditate on this reality, my soul is struck with awe in the moment. In the helplessness of my Savior, He is showing me what true love looks like: loving someone so much that you trust them to love You unconditionally even as you love them the same. It looks like being your most vulnerable to them, even though you have the power not to be. It means depending upon them to be the one to supply your needs even though you can take care of yourself. It means submitting to them out of love, forgiving them, and just being there for them, giving them joy in the moment, just because.
In that frail, fragile, helpless Child, I see Love in the flesh. My soul finds its joy. And I stand in this place, treasuring up all You have done, He has done, pondering it in my heart, and eternally grateful. Thank You for this most ultimate show of love. Amen.